Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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