Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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