Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
