Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
