If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day