I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
The dick lei will go down in squad history