Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize