i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
