What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
