I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Randomize
