My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize