Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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