Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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