Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize