I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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