hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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