More tranny stories later!
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
