): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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