what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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