If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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