Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
