it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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