What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Randomize
