Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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