I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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