she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
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