i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
He literally asked permission to hit on me
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize