No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
