i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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