HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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