time to smoke my breakfast
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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