So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
soo... how was my night?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
