Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize