Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Randomize
