Whod you bang
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......