Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
