super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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