oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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