I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
