R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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