I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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