My boss' voice literally gives me gas
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize