There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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