first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
