Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
