he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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