I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Randomize
