Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
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we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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