Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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