so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
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And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
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Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
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