Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize