so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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